Me, Myself and I

Growing up I never really considered myself a mexican, I just thought of myself as me, I think this is mostly due to the fact that I didn't have many people I could relate to. I was raised by women, around women and have never really felt like part of any subgroup so I guess I never felt the need to think of myself as a member of some group.

When I started kindergarten my teachers thought I was retarded because instead of playing with other children I would play by myself and talk to myself and my toys. It was just what I was used to being as alone as I was at home and all.

I was raised in a very catholic household, I don't think a day went by without someone mentioning Jesus or God or both, in fact my grandfather would pray for at least one hour every day (No, it's not even slightly exaggerating). Apparently he was something of a sinner in his youth and he prays everyday for forgiveness... damn catholic guilt! :)

Being in that type of environment and having gone to catholic schools all through elementary certainly had it's effect on me. I was an altarboy at my church, it's very strange to think back to those times, I can remember everything with such clarity, the crisp cool night air, the bushes at the side of the church and the white benches along it's side. The altarboy robes stained with candlewax, the "secret" area behind the tabernacle, the chalis, the bottle, the sacrement, the green kneepads at the altar, so many memories and they come in so clear.

I was also in a prayer group called the "Legion of Mary" which was just something to do as far as I was concerned, I was pretty much bored out of my mind. Although I did learn a lot from our leader who's name I cannot remember. I would be even more clueless about real life were it not for him.

I also belonged to our local chapter of the Boy Scouts. I didn't have too much fun there, a ten mile hike through mid-city Los Angeles is not as character building as you might think. Especially when your scout leader picks up pornography on the way... ooooh, that's a warning sign if I ever heard of one! Well at least he wasn't a homosexual pedophile like some of the staff at the church and school. (Luckily I never experienced any of that first hand).